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Everybody likes to go their own way


Name: Tânia
Age: 21
Location: Portugal
What are some of your hobbies/interests?: Reading, writing, listening to music, watching movies, thinking.
What are some particular likes of yours?: I love books and reading, movies that make me think and stir my feelings, especially when they don't have a happy/commonplace ending, writing, sunny days, being alone, nature (landscapes, flowers, the way smells change in between seasons), music and history.
What are some particular dislikes?: Mostly, certain traits of people's, like narrow-mindedness, pettiness, cruelty, lack of consideration and empathy for others and blind settling for conventionality, to keep it short. I am also not a social person, so having to talk to people, especially strangers, is incredibly stressing and draining to me.
Either describe your personality in five adjectives or write a short description, whichever you would rather do or think you are better at or think would give a better impression of who you are: I'm not overly fond of describing myself, so I'll go for the list of adjectives: Sensitive, intelligent, nonconformist, funny, compassionate.
What are your best attributes?: My sensitivity, my unusual (I believe) way of seeing things, my sense of humor, my passion for the things/causes I love, the way I always try to follow my own mind and not everybody else's, my compassion.
What are ones that aren't necessarily flaws but might be seen as negative?: Arrogance, stubborness, shyness, sarcasm, short temper, too often trying not to hurt other people's feelings (and thus not being blunt when sometimes I ought to be), cynicism, brooding.
Do you have any special talents? What are you "good" at? (Could be anything from making clothes to giving advice.): I believe I'm a good listener and always try to give well thought-out advice. I also think I'm a good writer and good at seeing things from various perspectives and imagining the various outcomes a situation might have, besides being able to put myself in other people's shoes and trying to imagine their feelings/thoughts.
Favorite book(s): Oh, the dreaded question! Pride and Prejudice, The Rice Mother, Jane Eyre, Wuthering Heights, Katherine, Carnivale, The Birth of Venus, The Passion of Artemisia, Persuasion, The Bell Jar, The Other Boleyn Girl, Romeo + Juliet, Sense and Sensibility, Villette, Agnes Grey, The God of Small Things, To Kill a Mockingbird, The Russian Concubine, Memoirs a Geisha, The Color Purple, among many, many others
Favorite movie(s): The Breakfast Club, Pride and Prejudice, Marie Antoinette, Lord of the Rings, Atonement, The Duchess, Sideways, Pirates of the Caribbean, Shakespeare in Love, Driving Lessons, The Prestige, Who Wants to Be a Billionaire?, Kiss Kiss Bang Bang, Gone With the Wind, Romeo + Juliet, Sense and Sensibility, Memoirs of a Geisha, again, among many others!
Favorite quote(s): I don't have a favorite, there are so many I love and agree with.
What is your favorite Jane Austen novel, if you have one?: Pride and Prejudice, definitely!
Do you have a favorite Austen heroine? Why her?: While overall I love Austen's heroines, my favorite has to be Elizabeth Bennet. Mostly because she's an unconventional woman who's ahead of her time. I love her intelligence and wit, the fact that she she thinks with her own head, and if she makes mistakes, at least they're her own mistakes. I also deeply appreciate her more contemplative, quieter side and her devotion to those she loves. It's also refreshing that she's not a ravishing beauty, which makes her more human, besides having allowed her to get the guy at the end, nonetheless!
What do you value more in a novel, social commentary or romance?: I have to say that I value the romance more, although if the social commentary is subtly and cleverly woven in the story, I don't mind it and actually appreciate it. I really like it when the author points out the flaws of the society around him/her, it's only when that's all they focus on that I start to lose interest.
What do you admire most in or about people?: Not much, actually. I pretty much think human race is doomed. I guess what I most appreciate is that there are still people willing to sacrifice themselves for a cause or to help people they love or whose welfare they're worried about, even if they've never met them.
What is the characteristic you most value?: Independence, not following the crowd.
What do you think is the most important thing about you?: I believe I'm sensitive and have insight into a lot of things other people usually miss.
Arrange these qualities in order of their importance, from most to least: Caring, selflessness, intelligence, wit, propriety, dignity, daring, idealism, pragmatism, integrity, unconventionality, humility: Integrity, unconventionality, intelligence, caring, dignity, wit, propriety, humility, daring, pragmatism/idealism (it's a tie), selflessness.
What is your opinion of marriage? Marriage is something I'm mildly indifferent about (it wasn't always like this - when I was younger I dreamed about getting married, like most people do). As I matured, besides starting to see how relationships never seemed to last and marriages crumbled so easily, I began to change my mind. Marriage is not something I dream about or actively pursue or anything of the sort, anymore. It's basically there. If someday I meet someone and feel that I'd like to get married after all, fine. If not, it's not a problem either. I dont think a marriage is really a guarantee of anything these days and I think it's naive to think only marriage is a sign of commitment. I understand the romance of it, but being with someone, with whom you built a safe, strong, healthy relationship, is just as good or even better than being married.
What is your view of love and relationships? Bitter, basically, due to personal experience. Sometimes I see couples that still give me hope that, if not a fairytale, at least love can still be a deeply blissful and romantic experience. But most of the time, seeing couples, even ones that you thought would always last, breaking up left and right leaves me thinking, "I'll never go for that." Again, relationships are not something I'm interested in or pursue. If something happens in the future, we'll see how I feel then. But I don't think love (and by that I mean romantic love) and relationships are essential to someone's happiness. I think that's being basically hammered into our heads, so we automatically feel lonely without someone and start maniacally searching. I don't think that's the way it's supposed to go. I definitely wasn't always of this opinion, but I came to believe in this with time. You can be perfectly happy alone. You just have to... embrace it and experience it for yourself, I guess. Of course as humans we're going to crave human interaction and companionship at some point, but people have the habit of running away from being alone and I don't think that's healthy. It *can* be done, and it can bring you happiness.
What do you think is better, a life of love and poverty, or a life without love but with wealth (lack of love and plenty)?: Again, I'm not as romantic as I used to be, so I don't think just love would work and help you if you're living a live of poverty. But lack of love and just wealth would make one feel empty, as well. Unless you were happy alone and reconciled to that lack of love, and therefore it wasn't painful to you (and the wealth would be an additional bonus). It really is difficult to pick a side just like that.
Are you more impulsive or deliberate?: Deliberate.
Are you more emotional or calm, levelheaded? Both. It depends on the situations. These days, I guess you could call me levelheaded, whereas in the past I was much more emotional, an open wound.
Are you more humble or proud?: Proud.
Are you more quiet or sociable?: Quiet.
More defiant or acquiescing?: Defiant.
More spontaneous, easy, unconstrained, or inhibited, anxious?: Inhibited/anxious.
Are you ambitious?: Yes.
What is your dream life like?: A quiet life with the opportunity to embrace my hobbies and do what I like and feel peaceful with my decisions and the choices I've made. Besides being proud of my work, as well.
What did you want to "do when you grew up"?: My biggest dream ever since I was a little girl, although I've had a lot more "fantastical" jobs in my mind back then, was always to be a writer.
Are you doing it to any degree? Have you grown up?: I'm (hopefully) about to graduate college and I plan to start applying both for my master's degree and for future jobs in the foreseeable future.
Why do you enjoy the company of people?/Why are you friends with your friends?: I don't, really. People and I usually clash a lot, the first and most apparent reason being due to my being extremely shy and socially anxious and other people usually not, or perceiving that shy people have some sort of mental problem. Also, my ideas and beliefs are not usually something that people get, so I'm kind of left out.
Are you close to your family?: The only member of my family that I'm 100% close to is my mother. My father and my maternal grandparents follow close, and the rest is pretty much a no.
Who's someone you admire? Why?: I'm not sure if I admire a certain someone, it's more people with certain traits. I really admire people with integrity, who are not afraid to be themselves and to speak unpalatable truths (I wish I could always be that brave). People who followed their minds and ambitions, even when the odds were all against them, and came through in the end.
What's your dream career?: Writer or film director.
What do you think of Jane Austen's writing in general?: What I love the most about Jane Austen's writing is how she's able to make me feel what the characters are feeling, the emotion and detail of certain scenes, and the consequences that an ill-thought decision could have in those days. She's also very witty and I like how she takes a jab at the society of the times.
What's your favorite article of clothing (pants, corset, etc.)? Any reason?: I'm usually a fan of period clothing, not modern clothing! Old gowns (up until the early 20th century) are something I totally swoon over.